With These Lesson Learned I Can Take Over The YA World - 25 Things YA Books Have Taught Us

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Paper Bindings | With These Lesson Learned I Can Take Over The YA World - 25 Things YA Books Have Taught Us (discussion)


Ever read a book and think: "Gee, this is familiar?" 


They say there is something like only 5 different stories out there and everything is just a variation of those few paths. It is no surprise then when things start to feel repetitive. After all, it is just life making sure you have sufficiently learned your lessons.


With that in mind, the girls here at Paper Bindings have put together this handy guide to help you successfully navigate the world of young adult novels.



Here are 25 things YA Books Have Taught Us:


  • What The Heck Are These Parental Units Other People Are Talking About? - If the hero is not an orphan, they have always lost one parental figure. Often the recently deceased adult cause the other one to short out, resulting in a cross country move, a 90 hour work week, or a complete mental breakdown. In other words, zero parental supervision.
  • And If You Happen To Have Both Parents At The Start - They either do not give one iota about their blooded offspring or they would burn the whole world down for them, thus resulting in their untimely demise early on.
  • Those New Guys? The Super Hot Brooding One And His Gorgeous And Oh So Totally Charming Cousin? - They are just going to have the fight of ages, forever damning their relationship to the pit of Mordor because of you. Aren’t you lucky to have two love interests at once?
  • Or Maybe You’re The New Girl - In which case you will totally steal the sexiest guy from the bimbo cheerleader. Don’t fret about her though...it’s not like her revenge will totally, and almost completely, cause a rift between you and your soul mate that is only repaired in the last chapter. Things like that never happen.
  • Best Friends of Opposite Sexes Can End Up Two Ways - Either you realize, after watching the other have this steamy relationship with your runner up BFF, or heavens forbid your archnemesis, that you have feelings for that person and confess your love in a fit of angry passion. You fight some and end up loosing your true love. But have no fear, because later on when you make up, you’re really making out with all your pent up frustration fueling your desires. If you do not get the steamy side with you give it a go, you find out it’s worse than making out with your brother.
  • That Bitchy Cheerleader/Ultimate Jock Character - Is always going to be your worst enemy. Don’t fight it. It’s a hate that makes no damn sense. Unless you covet their beauty, wealth, or boyfriend/girlfriend. Which pretty much means you ARE going to covet their boyfriend/girlfriend before the story is over.
  • Moving Is The Best Way To Find Your Soulmate - Who needs online dating? Just move to a town with the population of 200 and there he is. Of course, he’s already sampled the other girl’s dishes so it’s not like he’s just drawn to the fact you’re a shiny new toy or anything.
  • Advice? Common Sense? Who Needs Them? - Certainly not you, after all at 16 years old you are practically ancient. So go ahead and do that stupid thing you want to do that all the adults warned you against. It’s not like they might know what they are talking about or something.
  • A Road Trip Can Fix Anything (Especially if you are in a John Green novel) - There’s always the one meaningful trip with your friends that will change everything and put insight into everything, especially the Meaning.of.Life.
  • While We’re at it, Let’s Add that One Meaningful Summer to the list - where you will really find yourself.
  • People Are Extremely Dumb and Trusting In Dystopian Novels - That suspicious, grubby old dude over there who’s staring at your girls chest? That frantic, hot young lady who is practically begging you with her cleavage to help her find her lost kitten down a dark, dank alley way? Those overtly friendly, fake smiling, average joes that you just had to help out? What do they all have in common? One dumbass idiot, that would be you main hero/heroine. Oh, and all the water or food or people they’ve stolen from you. In fact, your nice, perfectly safe utopia that kept you safe from all the big, bad wolves out there is now the den of the worst of them.
  • Parents Have The Weakest Immune System/Worst Luck In Dystopian Novels - They are always the first to go. Always. Darn kids get all the luck, running around without rules, without law, without a single adult figure to watch over them. Maybe that’s why they always end up in the worst situations without parental protection/common sense.
  • Even Though You’re Sixteen, Someone Will Put You In Charge - Even if it doesn’t make any logical sense, the sixteen year old in the corner will always become the one to save them all. Have a perfectly capable adult with years of experience at the ready? Doesn’t matter. They’ll always go with the child.
  • There’s Always Another Book On the Horizon - Your story is so intense, so powerful, so important that it just cannot be contained to one book. You’ll probably be part of a trilogy.
  • There’s Always a Wall - Trust no one and nothing! Everything you were ever told is probably a lie. There is always something past the wall. And it will probably suck. 
  • That Guy/Girl That Everyone Is Drawn To? - Yeah, not human.
  • But Then Again, Neither Are You - What? You didn’t know you were the special the otherworld has been waiting on for centuries?
  • The Sword Is Always Cursed In Fantasy Books - Sure it grants the wielder mad skills, epic stamina, and the ability to breathe under water. But the cost is always one that, in the end, the hero is unwilling to pay. Thus resulting in the unfortunate demise of the sidekick or love interest, or both.
  • Your Mentor Is Your Greatest Source Of Information - Until he’s killed right when you need him the most.
  • You will only have one Bestie and no other friends - What are acquaintances? Surely you have never meet any of those.
  • Additionally, you will probably be an only child - Unless you have a younger sibling. Then if it’s a dystopian, they will die.
  • Villains Can Be Identified By Their Poor Fashion Sense/Unique Style - Because real villains walk around with a sign advertising their dastardly deeds. But just in case you cannot read, look for the odd duck, and you win the prize.
  • Let Me See Your Qualifications Again - Because between your small ragtag group, you will possess all the skills you will ever need to do anything. From free the enslaved world for technologically superior aliens to defeating an ancient and power evil that has been lurking in the shadows for centuries, you've got this.
  • If You’re Young, Clueless, And “Average” You’re Predestined To Save Us All - People will flock to you, villains will try to kill you, boys will fight over you….and not a single person except your archnemesis later turned best friend, will question how the hell a girl who know nothing about the world/situation/prophecy is going to be capable of doing anything.
  • If You Haven’t Felled A Giant, Summoned Then Slayed A Demon, or Have An Epic Love Affair Spanning The Centuries Than You Fail At Life - And you some how managed to turn in that twenty page paper on the uses of fungi, study for and excel at all those AP examinations so you can graduate as class valedictorian at the same time. If you haven’t done all these things by time you’re 18 years old, that’s it life’s over. There is no new adult book for you. You successfully become normal and boring, and are forced to read about other people’s epic adventures forevermore.


Do you feel sufficiently prepared to tackle the young adult world? Do you have a lesson to share with us?



RELATED: 25 Things I Learned From Playing Video Games


6 comments:

  1. OMG, this is brilliant and so totally true, as I read through I mentally ticked off all the books in my head that I have read that tick all those boxes. There are sooooo many! Wonderful post!

    Heather @ Random Redheaded Ramblings

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    1. Sometimes I don't mind reading the YA stereotypes, but other times it feels like I read one book after another with them.

      Thank you for stopping by!

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  2. Okay, but I totally don't know about the ruling the world part BECAUSE IM GONNA DO THAT. But *clears throat* the rest? Pretty much sums up books. ;-) The stereotypes don't usually bother me sooo much but OMG WHY DO THE PARENTS ALWAYS DIE?? And not the stupid 16 year olds who do the actual dumb stuff?? Gah. It's a bit illogical. xD And also, omg, yes, Someone Will Put You in Charge. XDXD Worst plot device ever. hehe.
    Thanks for stopping by @ Paper Fury!

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    Replies
    1. I think a world where you rule would be interesting and maybe a bit of fun filled with lots of cake and bacon. Though I don't like bacon myself. XD I don't ask for much in books, but putting an unqualified child in an all important role? Stupid. Can't stand it. At least make it reasonable if they need to be the hero.

      Thank you for stopping by,

      Delete
  3. All of these are great, but my personal favorite is: That Guy/Girl That Everyone Is Drawn To? - Yeah, not human.

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    Replies
    1. I'm sure if contemporaries thought they could get away with it, they'd add that one in too.

      Delete

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